Wordless Wednesday!

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Wordless Wednesday!

Nurse, We Have A Bleeder...

It's summer and I so want to be tan. Sadly, the melanin never kicked in for me and I am as white as white can be. I still have memories of being a young girl and my sister's boyfriend - now husband- yelling down the beach for me "hey albino!" and cringing with embarrassment. Those memories never seem to diminish. Fast forward roughly 35 years and seeing a woman still hung up about being Casper. So here I am standing stark naked in my bathroom spraying myself with instant tanner prior to my appointment with the orthopedist. Happy with the result, I quickly get dressed and bop off to my appointment.

 
After waiting for what seemed like forever I am escorted back to the doctor's office only to hear that I need another shot in my knee. Although unhappy with the news, I am relieved that I came prepared (wearing cute shorts now that I have this lovely little tan) so no access issue. With the resident looking on, the doctor takes out the needle and a soaking wet pad of alcohol. Before I could even process what was about to happen, I follow his eyes and stare down in horror as my entire leg tan is streaking down my leg and making puddles on the floor. I am mortified. No one says a word. No laugh! No giggle! Nothing! No eyes meet as all eyes
are on the floor. 

As I leave the office, one albino leg, one tan, I realize that no matter how old you are those embarrassing moments continue to bite you in the ass.

Happy Tuesday. ~ ADD 

I'm Dating Myself...

Today one of my Twitter followers asked the following question: "Would you mind sharing your most memorable first dates?" Well, I got to thinking about some of my first dates and the most memorable ones were the funniest for me. Here's a few from OCD:

1) A guy who carried around a Led Zeppelin album on our date then expected me to kiss it good night! That's not all, he picked me up in an old converted Ma Bell phone company van with a crushed red velvet sofa and shag carpet. Guess he thought his Love Shack on Wheels, coupled with his Zeppelin album, would get him a "Whole Lotta Love". Wrong. It did not work out for us, however I did introduce him to a gal who was into wearing "vinyl pants" and she became the queen of his Rockin' Love Shack.

2) I also had a blind date who was a Charles Manson look alike with John Travolta dance moves! He was not much to look at, but he could do the "Disco Duck" like nobody's business! Within minutes of meeting him, I started to call him; Disco Daddy-O. After one sip of my drink; I rushed off to the ladies room to call a friend to come and rescue me. Yes, I slipped out the side door--it was a serious case of Boogie Fever...highly contagious!

Please feel free to share your most memorable first date stories with us! ~ OCD

Wordless Wednesday!